Effective Communication

((Effective)) Communication


Thought I would expound on this subject a little more today, since I have been hearing so much about it:


At work I display the Word of the Day in my office. It started from me being my sassy-self. For quite a while I have been taking requests. (Yet again, today I heard the reference...but effective was added to it. Smart.)The most popular of late is: COMMUNICATION....

From an effective communication course document:

***"We hear only half of what is said to us, understand only half of that, believe only half of that, and remember only half of that."

As suggested, do not begin communicating with an accusation such as the "You" statement, begin with an expressive "I" statement.

I got a call this AM from a friend who was upset about the lack of communication in her relationship with her boyfriend. I understood totally. {Have had a problem here with being the end recipient of the "You" statements.} I have heard people at work complain about a lack of communication. I have had recent family problems stem from the lack of communication. There have been a lot of communication problems I have witnessed and experienced from the "He-Said-She-Said" thingy. And the biggest communication problem: Not "going directly to the source", but getting info from others. (aka gossip and bad advise). Heck my marriage failed primarily from the lack of communication and the inappropriate communication.

Hopefully we understand what "inappropriate" means. If needed, I can easily provide a list and detailed description....**OOPS - Guess there is a lack of understanding there, such as my ex! I guess it needs to be defined more clearly:

Using descriptive language with the "You" statements, tend to bring out defensive measures in the recipients such as: "You f***ing better" or "You f***ing should". Understand that you just may get the defensive "f*** off" in return.

In this day and age of technology and highspeed communication, I think that we need slow down and make an effort to get back to the basics of stop with the chat and text and acronymed messaging.

Talking....Listening...Sharing...Put down the f***ing blackberry, put down the book, stop staring at the boobtube, put down the cell phone and act like you give a shit!

Maybe you will have positive response back.

Taking the time to do all three above with a little bit of:

Eye contact....smiling...hugging...back patting....honesty (not brutal, please - TACT)...Oh gosh golly geeze! Do I really need to carry on?? No. Just remember that just beginning with a true effort - makes for real good communication and for that matter relationships!!!